Tag Archives: Smash Bros

Five Stages That Should Be In Smash Bros. 4

I know, another list post. I’m a lazy, sloppy excuse for a writer but I needed to post something so I don’t fall further into the depths of obscurity.  Just go with it, ‘kay?

Smash Bros. for Wii U and 3DS are getting ever closer and we’re slowly being drip fed tantalizing nuggets of information that only serve to make the game more exciting with each morsel of news. So I’m jumping on the bandwagon and giving my own list of stages that should be included in the new games. Because it’s Sunday and I don’t have any original thoughts.

Comet Observatory (Mario Galaxy Series)

It’s inevitable that in the new Smash installments, the Galaxy series is gonna be represented somehow. After all, it’s only some of Nintendo’s finest work to date.

In my mind, the stage would work similar to Isle Delfino from Brawl. You fight in the Comet Observatory, but it regularly whooshes (yes, that’s a word) off to various galaxies from the two games and you fight to cling on as the stage flies through space. Maybe one section has rolling chain chomps to dodge, and another has balls of fire flying in from all directions.

This way, we get one stage that manages to represent  loads of different aspects from Galaxy. Why yes Nintendo, you can have your cake and eat it.

Forsaken Fortress (Zelda: Wind Waker)

With the brilliant news that Toon Link is coming back to the brawl, we all know a Wind Waker stage is a certainty, especially if the 3DS is reppin’ Toon Link with a Spirit Tracks stage. Why not the Forsaken Fortress?

It could work like Shadow Moses Island did, if a spotlight catches you, you’re bombarded by a barrage of bombs. Every now and then, Ganon’s giant pet bird could fly down into the stage and start pecking at everything in sight, or flap items and characters off the stage.

Tourian (Metroid)

This stage would be absolutely mental. Metroids flying in at random times to suck on your brain, fireballs flying from every possible angle and every now and then, Mother Brain rises from the ground to take pop shots at you just to cause further chaos.

Maybe it could be a scrolling stage, taking you right through a faithful recreation of the final Metroid level from the first Metroid to Mother Brain at the end?

Smash Bros is all about frantic gameplay and a stage packed with traps like this would be perfect.

Pokemon Center (Pokemon)

This would be awesome. Death and destruction in a place of healing? Lovely. Just imagine a full scale brawl over the the peaceful music we all know and love.

Maybe random Pokemon could appear from behind the counter to cause trouble, similar to Goldenrod City in the original Smash Bros.? Or perhaps Team Rocket could storm in with various contraptions for stealing items and the like.

Wii Fit Park (Wii Fit)

What better way to scare off joggers than by having a great big throw down in the park? Since Wii Fit lady has been confirmed and we all juts have to deal with that, we might as well get a good stage out of the deal.

It could be a scrolling stage in which you have to keep along at a good pace or your unfit ways will kill you dead. DEAD. Perhaps every so often a parade of jogging Miis could come in from the opposite direction and trample you if you don’t get out of the way.

So then, that’s your lot. If you don’t agree or think you can come up with better, I don’t care. (I’m joking, please, I need the validation and approval of strangers). Thanks for reading.

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Wii Fit Trainer Joins the Fight in Smash Bros. 4

Right…

I’m not entirely what’s going on here, or indeed who’s idea it was to include such a strange character choice.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure she’s going to be a pretty handy character when we get down to the meat and ‘taters of the fighting, but if we don’t get Ridley or Dark Samus or some other Metroid character besides Samus for once because of this, I shan’t be best pleased.

The trainer is one of the new fighters joining the roster, including Mega Man and the Animal Crossing Villager. Expect more updates to come in pretty sharpish.

What Needs to Happen for Nintendo at E3

E3 is a joyous time of year. But like Christmas, or New Year’s Eve, it’s a time that comes burdened with a considerable amount of expectation, inevitable disappointment and drunk uncles that fall asleep on the sofa after Doctor Who is finished. Maybe not that last one, actually (although I’ve never been to E3, so who knows?).

The point I’m trying to make is that more often than not, people come away a little disappointed when they’re expecting to see every single game that they’ve heard a rumour for. Of course, when they don’t see that trailer for Halo 5, or that screenshot of Mario 128, or any sign of an Xbox One game, they feel cheated.

Of course, usually we hear announcements that more than make up for any let downs. The first ever trailer for Twilight Princess, demos of Mario Galaxy… top shelf Nintendo magic right there.

However, this year Nintendo have something to prove. Not for the 3DS mind, that machine is currently going from strength to strength. What we need, what Nintendo fanboys all over the globe are chomping at the bloody bit for, are more than just a handful of great games for the Wii U. 

We know we’re getting demos/glimpses of Smash Bros WiiU, a new 3D Mario, Mario Kart, Pikmin 3 and Wind Waker Wii U. This alone would make it a great year to be a Nintendo fan and those games are certainly the reason I’m wasting a chunk of my student loan in September to finally pick up a Wii U.

But this year Nintendo need to absolutely destroy the competition and drown us in a sea of major releases. If nothing else, I want to see Microsoft look even dumber than they already do.

It’s about time we got a look at a properly, brand new HD Zelda Wii U. I am more than happy to replay my favorite Zelda game remade in HD while I wait for the real thing, but I need something. That glorious Nintendo tech demo has invaded my dreams at night man. Gimme something more!

Mario Bros 4. None of this New Super Mario Bros bollocks, give me a gorgeous, HD side scrolling Mario game completely driven by original ideas and packed with secrets. Also, get rid of the god awful NSMB music. Seriously. Just stop.

I’m dreaming pretty big here and with so many big titles already being shown it is unlikely that we’ll get many more surprises, if any. But Nintendo clearly has something up it’s sleeve for this years event.

Lest you think me greedy, we part ways with one final, plaintive request; We know Retro Studios has been working on something. Please, by the power of Grey Skull, let it be Metroid Prime 4. The Prime trilogy was the dogs bollocks of first person shooters, fuck your Halo you bloody ponces. Other M was a great game, but I need to be able to shoot that scaly bastard Ridley in the face in glorious, first person HD.